Impending chocolate disaster

How odd, more than one person has suggested I blog about the fact the world is running out of chocolate. I can’t really add a lot to the news below. Read the extract and then click on the link to read the rest of this story.

The world is running out of chocolate. In 2013, the world consumed about 70,000 metric tons more cocoa than it produced. And now, Mars, Inc. and Barry Callebaut—two of the world’s biggest manufacturers of chocolate goods—are warning that by 2020, that consumption-over-production number could increase to 1 million metric tons a fourteen-fold bump. “Chocolate deficits, whereby farmers produce less cocoa than the world eats, are becoming the norm,” The Washington Post reported. We are in the midst of what may be “the longest streak of consecutive chocolate deficits in more than 50 years” and analysts say it’s only going to get worse.

via Comment: The race to save the world’s chocolate | SBS News.

Posted in Consumer marketing, Marketing Tagged with: , , ,

Windows 95

A colleague of mine was preparing for our #mHealthEvent, all about mHealth, mobile apps and wearables for the NHS and patients. In the process he came across these specs for Windows 95. Most apps are now bigger than the capacity you need to run an entire operating system.

System requirements for installing Windows 95:

Personal computer with a 386DX or higher processor (486 recommended)
4 megabytes (MB) of memory (8 MB recommended)
Typical hard disk space required to upgrade to Windows 95: 35-40 MB The actual requirement varies depending on the features you choose to install.
Typical hard disk space required to install Windows 95 on a clean system: 50-55 MB. The actual requirement varies depending on the features you choose to install.
One 3.5-inch high-density floppy disk drive
VGA or higher resolution (256-color SVGA recommended)

To use Microsoft Exchange and The Microsoft Network:

8 MB of memory
20 MB of additional hard disk space
Modem (required for using The Microsoft Network)
Optional components:
Microsoft Mouse or compatible pointing device
Modem or fax/modem
Audio card and speakers for sound

Posted in Marketing Tagged with: , , , , , , ,

Dear Mr Gates

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, “If Ford had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that go 1,000 miles to the gallon.”

In response to Bill’s comments, Ford issued a press release stating:

If Ford had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

  1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash…twice a day.
  2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road you would have to buy a new car.
  3. Occasionally your car would die on the motorway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
  4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre, such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
  5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive – but would run on only 5% of the roads.
  6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single, “This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation.” warning light.
  7. The airbag system would ask, “Are you sure?” before deploying.
  8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
  9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
  10. You’d have to press the “Start” button to turn the engine off.

PS: I’d like to add that when all else fails, you could call “customer service” in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign language how to fix your car yourself!

This sounds a bit apocryphal, I do hope it really is true.

Posted in Marketing Tagged with: , , , ,

Poundworld claims take a pounding

What an interesting concept, the manager’s special being 3 to 9 times the price of the rest of the stock in store.

When is a pound shop not a pound shop? When it sells items for £8.99, according to the Advertising Standards Authority. Wakefield-based Poundworld Retail has come a cropper with the advertising watchdog after claiming “everything £1” on its website, only for an eagle-eyed shopper to complain after spotting in-store “manager specials” for £3 and £8.99. The ASA decided this amounted to misleading advertising and told Poundworld Retail “not to claim that all products were priced £1 unless that was the case”. To be fair, Eightpoundninetynineworld doesn’t have quite the same ring to it.

via Poundworld claims take a pounding | Media Monkey | Media |

Posted in UK retail marketing Tagged with: , , , , , , , , ,

Voicemail apology

My voicemail has been going to an ether black hole. I’ve just fixed this; normal service resumed.

If you have left me a voicemail in recent weeks I won’t have received it. I wasn’t deliberately ignoring you.

My apologies.




Posted in Marketing

Web Design Week


Who thinks my colleagues are getting a little carried away? The idea was that our marketers at EMS Internet take on the web designers to see who can create the best website. They haven’t even got started yet and this video has appeared.

Posted in Marketing Tagged with: , , , ,

Testing 1212

I just had a look at one of my experimental websites, Testing 1212. I set it up years ago. It is a static site that provides a glossary of terms for sound engineers.

It rather proves the point that content is king; I don’t maintain, edit or promote the site and it continues to get 2-3,000 visits a month.

Testing 1212 â

Posted in Marketing Tagged with: , , , ,


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